The 2nd part of my story--I'm an extrovert again!

In the summer of 2014,  I visited the state of Washington.  I was able to spend  June and July there ---I think everyday it was sunny--I was tricked--haha.  I fell in love with the state and My Rainier.  At the end of the trip,  I decided I would move to Washington by my birthday on Holloween.  I missed it by 19 days--left for Washington with as much as I could fit into my truck on November 19th.

I had been living in the Pacific Northwest,  for a little over a year and just 45 minutes from Mount Rainier National Park and about an hour south of Seattle, Washington.  I had moved from Michigan where I had lived my entire life.  I left all my friends and family there.  The plan was to keep my relationships back in Michigan while making new friends in Washington.

 I was enjoying my new life and experience of living in the Pacific Northwest with it’s mountains and cities— getting good exercise while hiking in the mountains for several hours a couple days each week.  I also walked around the cities of Seattle and Tacoma often.

 I really liked all three places and especially enjoyed hiking in Mt Rainier National Park—that is a beautiful and AWE—some mountain.  I had joined a Mountaineer group to take classes and go on a few hikes with—- hoping these would make sure I stayed safe and didn’t get lost out there—I hate getting lost, especially in the mountains. I spent many hours walking around Seattle and Tacoma enjoying people watching,  along with just being out in the world around other human beings.  I was talking with people each day,  but mostly to those that worked in the stores and cafes.  

Life was good,  however,  I was feeling more and more lonely and like something was missing.  In addition to that, I was missing my family that I had left back in Michigan which included children,  grandchildren,  brothers and sisters.  And, I really missed my four friends there whom I had known many years.  Talking with them on the phone was nice but nothing like being in their PRESENCE, and feeling that, and laughing with them,  and exchanging hugs. 

 I had made one friend since moving to Washington in the fall of 2015.  Her name was Elmira—liked to be called El.  We both loved hiking in the mountains.  We had hiked three or four times,  so there had been time to talk and get to know each other a little. I liked her and enjoyed her company—but still, she wasn’t a close friend and that’s what I came to understand was missing.  I know now,  that also, I needed more time with people than the couple times a month we were able to get together for a hike.  

Close friends and family, what I left behind in Michigan was what I was missing and feeling.  I had thought —assumed, it would be easy to keep my relationships back in Michigan strong.   Accepted, that it would not be the same but we would remain close.   I began to see—and experience,  that  I was not going to be able to maintain those relations well,  and second, it was going to take longer and be harder to make new friends in Washington than I had imagined.  I began to wonder, just how long it was going to be before I would enjoy close friends again. 

 Upon realizing this,  and accepting it, I resolved to change,  myself,  and my life so I could begin enjoying people in my new home.  I was determined to find a way to shorten the time it normally takes to meet new acquaintances and make new friends.

 I increased my efforts to meet people and even chose the number of  “good friends” I would have by the end of the year in Washington—-six.   Fortunately for me, I love to learn and study a subject.  I was soon reviewing or reading for the first time, almost 20 books on communication and relationships.  Also, I was able to refer back to what I had learned while pursuing a degree in Communications just after turning 40.  Up until that time I was shy—an introvert.  I had come out of my shyness some during my 20s and 30s, but what really enabled me to begin not feeling nor acting so shy was what I learned in college.  I loved all the classes and was fascinated while studying about talking and relationships.  One semester took a class called Research in Communications—  spent that entire semester learning all I could about Social Phobia. 

Anyway, I soon had several things to do regarding talking to others,  and actions I could take that would enable me to meet and enjoy people—-and find my SIX friends.

  I became excited about this and was confident I could create and experience the friendships I wanted.  I was even more excited when I realized that many are missing pleasure and benefits from healthy relationships and friends in their lives and that I was going to help them get to where I was going. 

I developed the 3Cs.  The 3Cs stands for three communication skills—connect, conversation and commune.  I knew if I could learn these 3 skills,  they would greatly help me enjoy people and make new friends. To commune is the sharing of thoughts or feelings with others. 

Well, I have been practicing these communication skills and now I'm an extrovert when I want to be.  It's great to once again not be afraid of people and be able to enjoy them and easily talk to them.